By Aleece: First dates- The thrill of getting noticed, being selected, is high energy. I call that “twizzed.”
I was not “twizzed” by my husband when we FIRST hung out together in a group. He was unavailable, going out with my best friend, while having a long distance relationship with a girl back in his home state. He wasn’t sneaking around. She knew he stayed in touch with his home state girl by phone calls, but took my friend to her prom and hung out in our group.
Being with others is healthy and we have certainly missed this during the pandemic of 2020!
Friends input-When my BFF departed for her university, I stayed local. She told me to promise her I would say yes if “her” guy asked me out. I hesitated, there was no twizz, but with my “yeah, okay,” I made an agreement. She planted a seed, “he likes you and it is okay with me.” “Thoughts do become things.” I did get a call from him asking me to a movie. It wasn’t his idea. He was prompted by his mentor to get out of the house, “maybe give her a call.”
Sometimes relationships are helped along and supported by others, needing a nudge.
While mine is not a romantic beginning, it quickly became so. Between the time I made the agreement with my friend, and his call, I found myself open to the idea. Actually, I was talking about him when he called, and I told him so.
Synchronicity can be a sign.
Feeling safe enough to be vulnerable
At our next date, sitting across from him, I felt safe, no need to be guarded. We had gone to a place I chose, an iconic ice cream place in town, and lingered, til closing! I told him I was surprised how easy it was to talk together, he agreed. Later he gave me a kiss that was more than friendly, leaving me with butterflies. There was twizz!
Take time to let relationship unfold, like a flower opening up.
Rules at his university restricted engagement and that boundary allowed us to go slow and get to know each other. During those three years, our interest in each other fluctuated. We were busy and learning. He sensed I was a spiritual person and felt he couldn’t compete with the intimacy I had with Spirit. Later, when he got serious about his own spiritual path, I found it very attractive, but he was more detached then from pursuing me, seeking depth in himself. This was very grounding to our overall relationship. We had space for the unfolding of Love’s fullness.
This is crucial in the love dance. The music needs space between the notes, or it is noise!
Focusing on what matters to you makes you attractive. Relax and trust Life loves you. There is love for you. It starts with loving and trusting YOURSELF.
There are many soul lessons learned in relationships. I am available to hold space for you to choose love over fear, joy over fretting as you make your journey in trusting yourself to be loved.
I hope the beginnings of my 40 years with my soulmate, shines light upon your “happily ever after” path to meaningful intimacy and trustworthy partnership.
Love and Light,