By Jacqueline: I have many clients who say to me that they often feel like an outsider or judged for being alone. There is a difference from “being alone” to being “lonely”.
Most people do not want to be alone,but during the transition time between relationships we can use it to our advantage.
When a person is alone, we have time to think and process all the things that we have put off doing when we are in a relationship with someone. We have a chance to clear out the dead wood, contemplate, make room for new goals, aspirations and love that we want to bring into our life. We have a chance to be honest with our self about what it is, that I would like to create next. Everything is energy so therefore when you think positively you are sending out positive vibes into the universe. When you think negatively you are sending out negative vibes, that will often sabotage what you are wanting to create.
The most important aspect to being alone is learning how to love oneself and being happy and content in your own company. I believe that if we are able to achieve this, when we are comfortable in our own skin, then when we meet our next partner we are at peace and accepting of our self. Therefore, we are not needy or clingy of the other person and appreciate them as a gift from the universe as they compliment us and are not someone who has come into our life to fill up the empty space in our heart.
So how do we learn to love ourselves and feel comfortable in our own company?
Well, instead of coming home to an empty apartment and thinking, “another day or night on my own”, ask yourself what can I do on my own and enjoy it that I couldn’t do when I had people around me?
1) Meditation is a beautiful way to connect with your inner self, with your soul and you can learn to still the mind of all the day’s activities. It can bring you back into your center, into your heart and into a place of love.
2) Create, create and create. All those things that you wanted to create that you put off doing because you had other people around. Now is your chance to lose yourself in your passions, in your artwork, plan your goals for the next 12 months, rewrite all the qualities on the list of the next partner/soulmate, you would like to attract into your life. Pursue a new hobby that you always thought you didn’t have time for or to take up yoga that will revitalize your body, soul and mind.
3) Clear out the clutter that you have put off doing and create room for new energy to enter your living space. (You will feel clearer and cleaner in your environment and also in your thoughts). This will allow new energy and new opportunities to flow into your life.
4) Treat yourself to a movie or for dinner and just enjoy your own company.
5) Have you ever wanted to go on holiday but your friends weren’t able to get the same holiday leave as you? Well, now is your chance to go on a holiday to any destination/s of your choosing. You can do exactly as you like, when you want, how you want and be flexible with how much time you want to spend in a place. It could be a challenge for you to do this on your own and you can learn so much about yourself at the same time and other cultures.
6) Take the time to ponder upon what spirituality means to you? You may like to get to know God in your quiet space and learn to trust and have faith in all that he/she provides for you. Knowing God and the angels outside of a religious context gives you the freedom to make your own personal connection and the strength to know that he/she is there for you always, especially in your darkest hour.
7) Now is the time to have some healing sessions that you have been putting off. Release blocked emotions, old relationships, negative thoughts about yourself that no longer serve you and work on feeling renewed, ready for the next part of your journey and energetically clear.
8) Do something that you haven’t done since you were a child. Go rollerblading, play on a swing or go to a carnival and ride on the merry-go-round, whatever it is that excites the inner child within you.
9) Volunteer yourself to help animals or people in need and the experience will be both humbling and eye-opening. This is something that will make a difference to the life of an animal or a human and it will touch your soul on some levels and bring about personal growth.
Remember that when you are alone, you are good enough just as you are. You don’t require the approval of others and just because you are alone, you don’t have to feel lonely. (There is a difference). Get to know yourself, learn to be comfortable in your own company, do all those things that you put off when you were in a relationship or had people around you. Often we are alone not because of our own choosing. We may have been alone for some time or in transition between relationships. Most of all, love yourself first and foremost and the loving energy will vibrate out to all that we meet and touch the hearts of others and draw them to you.
Love, light and blessings,